must be the weather

As of this afternoon I will have three outstanding applications for money (2 for a fellowship, 1 for something much more trivial.) That's three more opportunities for rejection looming in the near future. I'm a right little ray of sunshine today, aren't I?

Since I opened my big fat mouth about the financial crisis, in a few places, I've come to regret it just as I knew I would. Combatting ignorance is hard enough; combatting stereotype-led black-and-white judgmental sentiment is much harder. Especially because it's not in my nature to argue "shiny white!" where others are screaming "coal black!", and condemnation of "those bastards who are richer than I am" is much more satisfying, and much less effort, for most people than a constructive attempt to understand and improve systems, which would make things better for everyone. (Apologies if that doesn't make sense to anyone but me. I could write a book about it, or I could speak in short metaphors and try to get back to the book - i.e. thesis - I'm supposed to be writing.)

And it's overcast and raining again. No wonder I'm so grumpy.